Japan is where I plan to go in March. There are several places I will travel in Japan upon touching down in Osaka International Airport on the first day. Depending on the flight schedule, we will go view Osaka Castle from the outside and then it is back to window shopping at Shinsaibashi. Yah, it is going to be window shopping because the things are so expensive I will need to store them for the later part of the trip. On the second day, I will take a ride on the bullet train to Kyoto where the Kiyomizu Temple is on the list of must visit; this is followed by Biwa Lake, probably one of the most ancient freshwater lake in the world. The coach will then take us all the way up north to the fishing village Kanazawa where we will rest in one onsen Ryokan. Oh did I mention that all these happen on the second day. Haha… ya I know it is super pack but I don’t have a month to travel so this is a condensed version.
I checked out YouTube as usual to find out what are the things we have to observe at a Ryokan. Well, in case I lost the link… here it is.
On the third day, it will be checking out early and going to the Omicho market to buy fresh local produce and then explore the ancient buildings and landscape that date back to the 17 to 19th century at Higashi Chaya Gai. After which, it is back to more ancient castles at Nagamachi and ancient gardens like Kenrokuen Garden. There will also be a pitstop at Shirakawa-go village, one of the preserved world heritage site. At Takayama Castle Town, we will see more ancient sake breweries and merchant houses before tucking into a hotel.
The fourth day will begin at the fresh produce market again and then proceed to the Ramen House to see demonstration of Ramen-making skills. The coach will then travel to Mount Fuji and enroute at various places like Hirayu Waterfall in Hida, hot spring, Azumino Winery where they make Jap fruit wines, Wasabi farm, and Mount Norikuradake. There will be a short tour at Fuji Visitor Centre. I don’t think it will include a walk up the Fuji because that will take a full day. We will then check into another onsen Ryokan. Hopefully, this one has views of Mount Fuji… so that I can sleep with my eyes wide open. Haha
On the fifth day, it is off to Tokyo Disney… I still cannot make up my mind on whether Disneyland or Disneysea is the better choice. Who has been to either? I am thinking Disneysea will be better since I have been to the Disneyland in Hong Kong but I am told it is very different. Argh
On the sixth day, we will visit more temples like the Asakusa Kannon Temple and then last minute shopping before we head off to take the flight back at night. Ya, it is SQ. Hope this visit to Japan is possible… they need 9 more folks to go. Argh… cross my fingers
This song brings me back to secondary school from 1992 to 1995. I just got into my third year at the school. A school I wasn’t proud of even till this day but at least the words come out easier now than before. But it is this school that helped me grew up from a child to a teenager. It was also this school that made me work harder than before because I wanted so much more… I wanted to be better. When I first got posted to Bedok North Secondary School, I had the impression that this would be my downfall - a school with gangsters and clans, smokers and fighters. I was partially right. It was this school that made me realise I can do more than just day dream. I recalled we had to participate in Sing Singapore. If you don’t know what that was, it was a singing competition where groups formed by various schools in Singapore sing songs that represents the country. The secondary one students were rounded up and we were asked to sing along a song. I couldn’t remember which, but it was a funny process because the teacher-in-charge would walk towards each of us, listen intently for a few seconds and decide if we should stay or go. I stayed. So did most of my friends… Ivan, Gary,… and my best girl friend Adeline… who unfortunately couldn’t be with us anymore… sigh… before I even continue… I want to let you know she was such a wonderful person. I still miss her badly but I know she would be better in heaven.
Those days were super wonderful. We would organise chalets in big bungalows at Elias Road because parents of some classmate was able to get it. Gary came to my house a couple of times… haha… he was a very naughty boy who… well admire Aaron Kwok for many reasons and i still can remember that hair. Hahaha… Ivan is the talented best friend who never fails to make me think how those pair of hands work on a piece of blank paper… In fact, although not all of them are on Friendster or Facebook… and we aren’t really meeting up because… well… everyone seems to have their friends now… … live goes on and it is such a wonderful experience… and I just want to thank them for being part of my life. Thank you.
No, it doesn’t matter if today is the eve of Christmas or our anniversary. It doesn’t feel any different or special anyway. Life is just going to pass by quicker than usual because I am alone.
What I regret not doing most is to make new friends when I was with you. Now that it is over, I do not know who to turn to, where to go, what to do, when to move on.
Gosh, if relationship is so fickle I seriously should not invest my time in it. I just sms my best friend. He didn’t reply. I guess he is busy. The last time I talked to him was in November. Still, I must have been a very bad friend because I have not been keeping in touch regularly with him. For all you know, I may not be his only friend and he has choice to choose who his friends are.
Why do I have just one best friend? What a stupid choice. Now that I am no longer in a relationship, I have no one else to turn to. Shit.
Dead Journey is Ben’s series of fictional short stories. If you like to find out more, please post your comments.
I might as well share with you what I did today because I find it super amazing how my thoughts just run like livewire. This morning at 8am I was at Ang Mo Kio… across the MRT station waiting for my supervisor to pick me up because today is special… the department went out of office and into a hotel conference room to do some deep and thoughtful discussion. Let me go back to AMK. I do not know how long have I not alighted at AMK MRT during the morning peak… maybe a year or more. The experience, however, is something I want to share with you. One of the escalator on the second level is under repair and there is a staircase next to it. So naturally, I have to walk down the stairs together with a big crowd. At the same time, commuters are also climbing the stairs up. I mean… why? Have we become so health conscious that we HAVE to climb stairs and fight for space in that narrow staircase? No… I don’t think so… It has, I believe, became a habit for them to go to this part of the station because that is what they normally do except that the escalator is under repair. Right.
So I walked out of the station and towards the junction. It was red light so vehicles were travelling perpendicular from my line of sight. Then those travelling straight stopped and the lights turned amber. The pedestrains waiting at the other side walked out of the pavement. And I am not talking about one or two… but ALL of them. I counted more than 30… walked out of the pavement… onto the road… across two lanes and stopped. WHAT THE F? Those vehicles turning to the right are still doing so… then the lights turned amber… and now it was green man… those pedestrains on the road literally MARCHED towards me… and I had to shovel my way through the angry morning crowd… going against the flow is indeed crazy on a morning.
Boy, am I glad I live two MRT stops away from the busy AMK.
The brand new iPad does more than play music, video, surf, and call. This iPad can be hooked up to your body for fast download of, erm, fluid information. Wahahahaha~
2 AM and she calls me ’cause I’m still awake,
“Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,
I don’t love him. Winter just wasn’t my season”
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites. You’re all here for the very same reason
‘Cause you can’t jump the track, we’re like cars on a cable
And life’s like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe… just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe
May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
“Just a day” he said down to the flask in his fist,
“Ain’t been sober, since maybe October of last year.”
Here in town you can tell he’s been down for a while,
But, my God, it’s so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I’ll just sing about it.
Cause you can’t jump the track, we’re like cars on a cable,
And life’s like an hourglass, glued to the table.
No one can find the rewind button, boys,
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe… just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe
There’s a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout ’cause you’re just as far in as you’ll ever be out
And these mistakes you’ve made, you’ll just make them again
If you only try turning around.
2 AM and I’m still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it’s no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I’m naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you’ll use them, however you want to
But you can’t jump the track, we’re like cars on a cable,
And life’s like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
woah breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe.
Damn… don’t you just hate it when you are left in the cold because you are not good at anything? Or ignored completely? … I really dislike it. I get really jealous growing up and I still am when people around me are doing things they are really good at … and when you do the same thing… you suck! Sigh… that is exactly how I feel most of the time. And then you get compliments… well sort of… like “Oh you are not bad, really. But you could have done alot better blah blah blah…” Please keep the crap. I mean just say I suck! I can take it. Afterall, I know exactly where I stand. oh, do I sound jaded?
Hmm… the truth is I have tried what I like to do… you know the dream job… kind of… until reality strikes… and you are beaten to the ground… thinking well “i could have been… but no… not as good” So what exactly am I good at? … Anything?
cut, cut, cut, cut, cut… everything seems to be slashing… from jobs to pay… but commodities are increasing exponentially… what is happening? Is this really the 21st century great depression? maybe i have not felt the impact yet but the impending outlook seems bleak and it is only a matter of time when it is my turn to be laid off. Perhaps the last to be laid off… i hope. I mean being in the education section is somehow like a safe haven… like food, you need to learn and upgrade to be better prepared for a particular job… or at least move closer to your dreams… if only there is a miracle now… but i doubt it will be substantial or immediate. Damn… but we are still spending… ha… so i think my theory is somehow correct… that those with “real” monetary power are playing games with us. f*** them!
You know… I should be sleeping now. It’s almost 2am. And I am having a block nose and I can’t really breath. But I can’t sleep. It is getting crazier each day. When did I start to have such a routine? Well… seriously… it is after I have my own laptop. My life has evolved into one that requires me to sit in front of the lappy and searching for more and more music, movies, news, and thinking of crazy things like working overseas as a stun man, jumping off the cliff, swimming with the sharks, and probably making out in the open. Yeah. It’s that crazy. I should stop rambling. I should sleep now. Good night
Things have been going quite alright for me. Despite the economic downturn, I will still receive some bonus but it is not going to be like the good old time when bonus can mean a high four digits. I am very thankful that my increment is not freezed yet and there is no news of pay cut so far. I am very lucky indeed. Come to think of it, when times are good I did think of leaving the company and pursue my interest elsewhere. In fact, anywhere will do. But now with the sudden change, I am grateful I’m still employed yet I yearn to pursue something I want to do in life.
When I first stumble upon this current organisation, I have no idea what I want to do after I graduate. I remembered going on to the e-career thingy - yes, it was the first time and how timely indeed - and I was reading all the job descriptions and openings. I thought, hey, I would never get into any of these jobs simply because I had studied the wrong course. For those who don’t know, I graduated as a civil engineer at NUS. I love to the modules and it really challenges me to death especially during the three years in NUS. I recalled having gone through lectures after lectures, copying assignments from expert classmates who are so remarkable to solving problems, borrowing tons of books on calculus and wondering what it all means in life, and sleeping on the tables in the library from mental exhaustion. Man, I have had enough of that. So if you ask me what I have been doing for the past 6 years of my academic life, I have been reading stuff on soil mechanics, hydraulics, structural analysis, materials, programming, etc, etc, etc. Things that interest me at first but aren’t really what I want to do in life.
I tried to diversify. Thank goodness for NUS, I was able to do that and pretty much done abit more than what I should do. I ventured into marketing, human resources, law, biology, and so forth. Well, they interest me but the amount of time spent on bidding for those modules are hell-crazy. I literally have to decide what I want to do each semester and bid for the modules with… thousands others… for the coverted spots. And being a very poor student with no laptop, I have to use the computer labs in school. I tell you, I can relive that moment anytime. It is hilarious. I had never seen synchronised clicking and scrolling of pages before.
Of course when it was time to say goodbye and eventually we graduate, those computer labs became a place for seniors to discuss about job offers and starting salary. And I would become depressed because three months before graduation, my peers in other engineering courses have already been snapped up. That was in 2005. The economy was still not doing well then, especially for the construction industry. That e-career page set up my NUS was without any listing for a civil engineer. How pathetic! That half-year before I graduate, I wondered if I had wasted six years studying civil engineering. Yes, the passion for building is still there but can that be translated into actual job? I doubt so. I went on a buy-Saturday-newspaper frantic cycle every weekend. I looked at the big organisations, nope, nothing for a civil engineer. I scrolled through the temporary job ads, okay maybe some openings for civil engineers but they were looking for those with prior experience. I had only three months of on-the-job experience during my SP days. But I saw this ad that said, “$100 a day. Cash!” Wow, $100 is pretty decent for one day. So I went down and discovered it was a scam. Whatever.
To cut things short, I have learnt that passion and capability are two separate things. Like I have a passion for music but pursuing it as a song-writer is kind of far-fetched because I am not talented enough. If I were, I would have pursued that line. Nor am I good enough to be a radio presenter. Something I would love to do. Nor am I an actor because I will definitely look bad on screen.
You see, there are things in life I want to do but I am not good at. And in the process of discovering my abilities and shortcomings, I have narrowed down quite a number of jobs. But I am not giving up because I believe I may one day be the person I want to be. A personality that fits my belief. Only then would I be happy. Will I?
couldn’t be with us anymore… 
Gary came to my house a couple of times… haha… he was a very naughty boy who… well admire Aaron Kwok for many reasons and i still can remember that hair. 
Hahaha… Ivan is the talented best friend who never fails to make me think how those pair of hands work on a piece of blank paper… 
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